Tuesday, August 10, 2004
DOH!!!
Golf, as most of the people know, is a very expensive, and even"high-class" sport. CEOs and upper managements play golf in place of business meetings. Presidents and diplomats hit the tee while discussing international affairs. But nowadays, even a poor, "lower-class" college graduate, such as myself, can enjoy the luxury of the crisp feel when hitting the small white ball up and away.
Now, that's great news for average Joes like us. However, I would just like to warn the severe injuries that could be inflicted while attempting to even hit the fcking ball. Not only is golf a voilent sport, but golf can turn even the most patient (wo)man into a crazy, angry lunatic. Here's how.
After learning that his boss plays golf, his dad plays golf, and all the important people in this world play golf, Wei-li decides to buy a set of golf clubs and start playing, hoping that one day he could kiss up to his boss or school his dad. Wei-li strolled into the golf shop and came out over a gran short, a major damanage to his financial health, but nothing beats the self-important feeling of carry a brand new set of irons. He proudly places the clubs into his trunk, glad that he made sure that the bag actualy fits in his trunk.
Here's the best part. Wei-li's shots are good, but not great; consistent, but has room for improvements. So he finds a coach (expensive!) to improve his strokes. The coach turns out to be an arrogant, old bastard who only cares about his career and not his students. Okay he's not that bad, but he totally screwed up Wei-li's shots by -100 yards (80% LESS the distance he used to play). So ever since that first lesson, he practices every other day, spending an hour or more each time to practice his swings.
Two weeks later, no improvements. Instead, he realizes that his right thumb is bleeding, which he couldn't feel a thing anyway because his hands are so numb that he could barely hold a firm grip. 100 balls normally takes 100 swings pre-lesson. Now it takes him 150 swings, not just hitting the ball, but ALSO clubbing the ground. WTF! He pays $6 every other day to wack the ground and hurt himself.
But Alas! God shows mercy on diligent hardworkers like Wei-li. While he was "trying" to hit the ball in the crowded driving range, he, once again, wacks the ground before barely touching the ball. The ball weakly rolls off about 10 yards away as usual, but this time he also sees this thing flying higher and farther than the ball, into the right field. Wei-li blankly stares at his broken/detached/fcked up 7 iron, confused.
First reaction: "SHT!! There goes my hundred bux!"
Then acclamation: "OMFG. That felt damned GOOD."
I've been wanting to do that since my first lesson.
Now, that's great news for average Joes like us. However, I would just like to warn the severe injuries that could be inflicted while attempting to even hit the fcking ball. Not only is golf a voilent sport, but golf can turn even the most patient (wo)man into a crazy, angry lunatic. Here's how.
After learning that his boss plays golf, his dad plays golf, and all the important people in this world play golf, Wei-li decides to buy a set of golf clubs and start playing, hoping that one day he could kiss up to his boss or school his dad. Wei-li strolled into the golf shop and came out over a gran short, a major damanage to his financial health, but nothing beats the self-important feeling of carry a brand new set of irons. He proudly places the clubs into his trunk, glad that he made sure that the bag actualy fits in his trunk.
Here's the best part. Wei-li's shots are good, but not great; consistent, but has room for improvements. So he finds a coach (expensive!) to improve his strokes. The coach turns out to be an arrogant, old bastard who only cares about his career and not his students. Okay he's not that bad, but he totally screwed up Wei-li's shots by -100 yards (80% LESS the distance he used to play). So ever since that first lesson, he practices every other day, spending an hour or more each time to practice his swings.
Two weeks later, no improvements. Instead, he realizes that his right thumb is bleeding, which he couldn't feel a thing anyway because his hands are so numb that he could barely hold a firm grip. 100 balls normally takes 100 swings pre-lesson. Now it takes him 150 swings, not just hitting the ball, but ALSO clubbing the ground. WTF! He pays $6 every other day to wack the ground and hurt himself.
But Alas! God shows mercy on diligent hardworkers like Wei-li. While he was "trying" to hit the ball in the crowded driving range, he, once again, wacks the ground before barely touching the ball. The ball weakly rolls off about 10 yards away as usual, but this time he also sees this thing flying higher and farther than the ball, into the right field. Wei-li blankly stares at his broken/detached/fcked up 7 iron, confused.
First reaction: "SHT!! There goes my hundred bux!"
Then acclamation: "OMFG. That felt damned GOOD."
I've been wanting to do that since my first lesson.
